Imagine yourself as a Mother Tree, standing tall and strong with dignity. She’s confident and resilient, and most importantly, she grows freely, expanding her roots and branches without restrictions. Now, picture a bonsai tree, perfect on the surface yet confined, cut off from its true essence.
For years, I lived like that bonsai tree—responding to others' unspoken expectations and feeling stuck in limiting beliefs. Then, I hit the midlife transition and noticed physical changes like wrinkles and gray hair. I was overwhelmed by the fear of aging, the uncertainty of what was ahead, and the judgment of others.
If my story resonates, I’m here to empower you with 5 pearls of wisdom from Mother Trees. Discover how you can thrive like a Mother Tree, from awareness to aspiration in midlife.
🌲🌳🌲
#1. Embrace imperfection like a mother tree
Looking at Mother Trees, you’ll notice broken branches, scars, and unique shapes. These imperfections are what make them beautiful and inspiring.
Let go of the idea of perceived perfectionism because it keeps you trapped in fear. Do you want to spend your life worrying about others’ opinions? Embrace your authenticity because you’re perfect for who you truly are.
#2. Nurture Your Growth
A forest guide once told me that a tree's roots are 2 to 4 times bigger than you see above ground. These roots grow nutrients to help the tree grow and nurture others.
Just like those roots, you need to nourish yourself before nurturing others. Prioritize nurturing your body, mind, and soul to discover your true purpose. There’s a special gift waiting to be uncovered deep within yourself.
#3. Cultivate Resilience as a Mother Tree
A Mother Tree symbolizes resilience. It has overcome challenges like forest fires, droughts, extreme temperatures, etc. With every obstacle, it continues to grow and evolve to become what it is today.
You might have faced life challenges you wish hadn’t happened to you, but these challenges have made you strong. Reflect on your motherhood journey. Don’t you see your patience, flexibility, and remarkable resilience? Trust in your ability - you’re stronger than you think!
#4. Hornor Your Tree Rings
Trees add a new ring to their trunks every year, marking their growth and age. The older the tree, the more wisdom and experience it holds. A Mother Tree stands as a symbol of quiet dignity.
You may sometimes feel unworthy or too old to make a meaningful impact. But as a tree grows each year, you have grown with your children. Your commitment, determination, and consistency have shaped who you are today. Age brings wisdom and the power to inspire and influence others for a better future.
#5. Simplify Like a Mother Tree
A Mother Tree intuitively understands where to focus her energy for optimal growth. She is clear on what resources she needs, chooses where to expand, and skillfully sheds unnecessary branches and leaves to conserve her vitality.
Your midlife transition mirrors this beautiful process. As you navigate menopause, see this as a perfect opportunity to pause and simplify your life. Trust your knowing, let go of the things that no longer serve you, and embrace this phase with confidence and clarity!
Conclusion 🌲🌳🌲
Midlife transitions can feel overwhelming if we continue to live like bonsai trees, focused on external appearances and limited by others’ expectations. Instead, explore your midlife by thriving like a Mother Tree, nurturing your inner growth, and embracing your authenticity.
Remember how you thrive like a mother tree:
- Embrace Imperfection
- Nurture Your Growth
- Cultivate Resilience
- Honour Your Tree Rings (Experience & Wisdom)
- Simplify Your Life
Believe it or not, you’re already a Mother Tree. Hornor the wisdom you’ve nurtured, and grow into your most authentic self. 💕
Shifting your mindset from a pre-empty nester mom to an empowered empty nester can be one of the hardest transitions in the motherhood journey. As your children become more independent, you may experience unexpected emotions like sadness and emptiness.
You believe you should be happy, but when nobody is around, tears run down your cheeks. Nobody seems to notice your pain: “Does anybody care about me?” You feel alone even when you’re with loved ones. But you numb your feelings and hope that one day your life will change.
I understand how you feel. Who would have imagined this was coming at the end of parenting? But this transition also offers a unique opportunity for growth and self-discovery. In this article, I'll show you How to shift your mindset from empty to empowered mom in 3 simple steps.
Step 1: Raise Self-Awareness
Shifting your mindset begins with self-awareness. This could be the hardest part because you’ve been busy nurturing others. As a result, you might feel disconnected from yourself. It’s totally normal.
Now, I want you to start reconnecting with yourself by asking these questions:
- What makes you feel that way?
- When do you experience these feelings?
It may be uncomfortable, but that’s where you’ll find a solution.
Step 2: Accept Your Feelings to Shift Your Mindset
Once you connect with yourself and identify specific emotions, it’s time to accept them. Make sure to be compassionate and talk to yourself as you would to your best friend. There’s no space for self-criticism or judgment.
Earlier, I mentioned hoping for life to get better. Here’s the biggest mistake I made. I was waiting for someone to change my life. I eventually understood that nobody was coming: radical acceptance was scary, but necessary.
As soon as you accept where you are, you’ll experience a sense of relief because you’ll feel seen, heard, and understood by YOURSELF!! This may surprise you, but the relationship you have with yourself is the most important aspect of your life.
Step 3: Focus On What You Can Control
Next, let’s identify what you can control and not. For example, you can not control the weather, but you can bring an umbrella.
Let’s practice this using an example of feeling alone. You CAN’T control others to be there for you all the time to fill your alone time, but you CAN invest that solo time in learning something new.
Notice how reframing "alone" to "solo" instantly gives you a sense of empowerment?
On the other hand, when you focus on the things you can’t control, that’s where you’ll feel friction. This is when you may feel sad, lonely, or unworthy. Always remember to focus on what is within your control.
Exercise For Shifting Your Mindset
Let’s do a simple exercise to stretch your brain. Shifting your mindset is all about seeing things from different perspectives. It’s time for you to connect with yourself and ask the next 3 questions:
- If I were my child: “Would I like to see my mom waiting for a life change?” Or “Would I want to see her thriving?”
- If I were my best friend: “What advice would I give her going though the pre-empty nester phase?
- Look around your communities: Where could I use this solo time to help others?
Seeing things from different perspectives help you find the light to overcome obstacles in your life.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the key to becoming an empowered empty nester is shifting your mindset with self-awareness and acceptance. By focusing on what you can control, you'll be able to reframe your narrative. That's how you can unlock your potential and become a thriving mom! Embrace the pre-empty nester phase with compassion, courage, and positivity, as your best years are ahead of you! I believe in your ability to create the life you REALLY want!
Love & Care 💕
Kumiko
Midlife can be a pivotal time. With kids growing up, careers shifting, and personal identities evolving, it's easy to feel overwhelmed. In the middle of chaos, there's a common trap many fall into: the belief that "I need to change."
While this notion might seem harmless, it often leads to unnecessary stress and dissatisfaction. The truth is, you don't need a complete overhaul. You simply need space to reconnect with yourself.
In this post, we'll explore how you can embrace midlife motherhood with grace, without feeling pressured to change everything.
Understand the Transition
First things first: midlife isn't an endpoint but a transition. Just like your teenage years brought transformation, midlife offers new growth opportunities.
Embrace these changes as part of your transformation journey instead of seeing them as a problem that needs fixing.
Celebrate how far you've come
Take a moment to look back on all you've accomplished. Whether you've raised children, built a career, supported others, or managed a home (or all of the above!), you've done incredible things.
These achievements are proof of your resilience. You're not starting from scratch; you're growing from a strong foundation.
Get clear on what you really need
The pressure to change often comes from external pressures or comparisons. Instead of focusing on what's "wrong", ask yourself: What really matters to me now? Maybe you don't need a reinvention, just a few gentle shifts.
Small tweaks from within beat big changes from outside.
Set Realistic Goals
You don't need a master plan. What you need instead is permission to take one small step at a time. That could mean trying a new hobby, making time for self-care, or reconnecting with someone you miss.
These small actions can enhance your quality of life without the pressure of a complete life overhaul.
Prioritize Self-Compassion
This phase can bring uncertainty, and that's normal. Remember to be kind to yourself. Talk to yourself like you would to your bestie: with grace, patience, and understanding.
It's okay to feel messy and take things at your own pace - there's no comparison!
Seek Support
You don’t have to figure things out by yourself. Talk to a trusted friend, join a support group, or work with a coach or therapist. Having a safe space to share your thoughts can offer clarity.
You're not alone in this journey.
Embrace Your Authentic Self
Most importantly, embrace who you are. Midlife is a time to honour your true self, prioritize what matters most, and let go of what no longer serves you. Cultivate your passions, values, and unique qualities.
Authenticity is far more fulfilling than any shiny, surface-level change.
Conclusion
As a mom in midlife, it's natural to feel the urge for change. But you don't need to flip your life upside down to feel fulfilled. By honouring your journey, setting achievable goals, and embracing your authenticity, you can navigate this phase with clarity and grace.
Remember, you're evolving, and your transformation is beautifully yours.
Love & Care 💕
Kumiko
